Perhaps confidence isn’t something to be built; it's right under the surface when that heavy bulk of needing to be someone is lifted. Embracing being no one helped me feel authentic and confident, which, in my opinion, is way cooler than any expensive-looking sweater.

Measuring from zero helps us keep perspective. I’ve often recommended a similar exercise, but in this version you make your friends disappear instead. You might know it already: when you’re with a loved one, imagine that they’re gone from your life and you’re not actually seeing them in the room with you, you’re just remembering what it was like wh... See more

What you want is never a thing.

All we ever seek, and all we ever avoid are feelings. Feelings run the world. They constitute the only useful product of all material transactions between humans and their environment. Just like your body can’t use the food it eats for energy until it’s turned to glucose, we can’t really make use of the things we seek until they deliver certain fee... See more

We love to convince ourselves that things are circumstantial. Like, I love painting, but I don’t paint anymore because I’m too bus y. Like, I’m not really happy with my suburban life, but I’m trapped in it indefinitely . But what if these things aren’t circumstantial? Instead of blaming the external world, imagine believing that some part of me wan... See more

The idea of research as leisure activity has stayed with me because it seems to describe a kind of intellectual inquiry that comes from idiosyncratic passion and interest. It’s not about the formal credentials. It’s fundamentally about play.