on building community

After seeing some 800~ events take place at The Commons i've learned 3 things:

• 1) plausible deniability: if you say we're here to make friends, friendship doesn't happen. if you say we're here to research or talk about niche topic x and y, friendships always form. same applies to dating.


• 2) communities are built from strong 1-1 relationships. as an e

... See more

“The intimacy that comes with time and attention allows us to be vulnerable with others. This intimacy, across a group, can become a durable network—like mycelia. We are strongest when we feel safe being soft.” To me, that network feels like security.

What would group living, based on that definition, look like as a guiding principle in our lives—however we structure our homes? I think the first step toward that is building routines with others—like the ritual of a shared meal, as you mention—things you can do inside of a home and outside of one. I wanted to encourage readers to look for ways to... See more

Many people have long wondered why the Grateful Dead succeeded in creating a world of Deadheads. It turns out that’s because the people who allocated tickets understood familiar strangers. If you bought a ticket for a Grateful Dead show in Miami, they kept a record of who you were seated near. Then, if you bought a ticket for the Nashville show, th... See more

We don’t build community .

We build containers where community has a chance to emerge.

The community opportunity often lies in creating an experience that has nothing to do with your topic (ie. a hiking trip for accountants). Our default is to do something focused on the topic like a “talk” or “course” or “discussion group” but sometimes, just having them do something fun together is much more effective. The goal is to get your membe... See more