building community

“The intimacy that comes with time and attention allows us to be vulnerable with others. This intimacy, across a group, can become a durable network—like mycelia. We are strongest when we feel safe being soft.” To me, that network feels like security.

And thus our tradition began. Every weekend, we would bring our folding chairs out onto the street – we had to make do since our house doesn’t have a stoop – and enjoy our caffeine. As we saw people entering or exiting their homes, we'd enthusiastically wave them down, introduce ourselves, and write down their names in our shared spreadsheet. I wor... See more

The community opportunity often lies in creating an experience that has nothing to do with your topic (ie. a hiking trip for accountants). Our default is to do something focused on the topic like a “talk” or “course” or “discussion group” but sometimes, just having them do something fun together is much more effective. The goal is to get your membe... See more

We don’t build community .

We build containers where community has a chance to emerge.

After seeing some 800~ events take place at The Commons i've learned 3 things:

• 1) plausible deniability: if you say we're here to make friends, friendship doesn't happen. if you say we're here to research or talk about niche topic x and y, friendships always form. same applies to dating.


• 2) communities are built from strong 1-1 relationships. as an e

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Many people have long wondered why the Grateful Dead succeeded in creating a world of Deadheads. It turns out that’s because the people who allocated tickets understood familiar strangers. If you bought a ticket for a Grateful Dead show in Miami, they kept a record of who you were seated near. Then, if you bought a ticket for the Nashville show, th... See more

What would group living, based on that definition, look like as a guiding principle in our lives—however we structure our homes? I think the first step toward that is building routines with others—like the ritual of a shared meal, as you mention—things you can do inside of a home and outside of one. I wanted to encourage readers to look for ways to... See more