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The reason this is so liberating, for anyone with even a hint of perfectionism, is that it means you get to give up on the exhausting struggle to take charge of your life, so as to steer it in a new direction. You get to abandon all hope of one day finding the perfect time management system– or perfect relationship, job, neighborhood, etcetera– and
... See moreOliver Burkeman • There's No Such Thing as a Fresh Start
change and perfectionism
As you're presumably aware, this is a terrible mindset for actually making lasting changes. What you need, instead, are tiny goals and a commitment to incremental progress (" small wins"), plus a willingness to encounter failure after failure as you stumble toward improvement. To put it another way: fresh- startism is a form of perfectionism, and
... See moreOliver Burkeman • There's No Such Thing as a Fresh Start
Left- brain attempts to control the body or emotions often sound something like this: I need to go to sleep right now; I'm nervous about my meeting at work tomorrow and I don't want to be; I don't have any right to be angry. Perhaps there's a memory you keep reliving and you wish it would go away. Or a feeling of regret you can't seem to change.
... See moreChris Niebauer • The No Self, No Problem Workbook
The problems that ADHD creates are not so much with knowledge, or the back part of our brain, but with performance, or the front part of our brain. That is where we use that knowledge in daily life for greater effectiveness. Thus, the problems for you have more to do with not using what you know at critical points of performance in your life than
... See moreRussell A. Barkley • Taking Charge of Adult ADHD, Second Edition
The left brain was simply making up interpretations, or stories, for events that were happening in a way that made sense to that side of the brain (a shovel is needed for a chicken coop) or as if it had directed the action (I got up because I needed a drink, or I laughed at my own joke). Neither of these explanations was true, but that was
... See moreChris Niebauer • The No Self, No Problem Workbook
I don’t know if people develop such a deep connection to the things they buy these days. Many people have a strong desire to possess the latest thing, and manufacturers and advertisers know this. It is not by accident that merchandise is not created to last. The objects of our desire are constantly changing. And our desires for the objects we
... See moreThich Nhat Hanh • How to Focus
* innium
Equally crucial, clear goals are an important flow trigger.12 The state requires focus, and clear goals tell us where and when to put our attention. When goals are clear, the mind doesn’t have to wonder about what to do or what to do next—it already knows. Thus, concentration tightens, motivation heightens, and extraneous information gets filtered
... See moreSteven Kotler • The Art of Impossible
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi has discovered in his research that one of the simplest and most common forms of flow that people experience in their lives is reading a book—and, like other forms of flow, it is being choked off in our culture of constant distraction. I thought a lot about this. For many of us, reading a book is the deepest form of focus we
... See moreJohann Hari • Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention And How to Think Deeply Again
Morning Pages make us more graceful, but that grace is intensely practical. We are nudged to act on our own behalf, and if we balk, we are nudged again. The pages will nag until we are willing to take action. The pages inaugurate change, and they walk us through that change. We do end the bad relationship. We do get sober. We do lose unwanted
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