Agalia Tan

My favorite quote is by Goethe: at the moment of commitment, the universe conspires to help you. The universe knows when you’re committed. All the trials and tribulations are merely tests of your commitment. Pass the test. Keep going. Even if the rest of the world ignores you, the universe sees you.

Developing taste is an exercise in vulnerability: it requires you to trust your instincts and preferences, even when they don’t align with current trends or the tastes of your peers. Because while having taste is cool, taste itself reflects a certain type of uncool earnestness – a commitment to one’s own obsessions and quirks.

the thing is, as an adult, you get to make your own cool. you get to choose your own friends, live your own life. and let me tell you, in my life, where i make the rules, i am the coolest cat around.

being passionate about your hobbies is cool. asking good questions is cool. reading books is cool. taking notes is cool.

thinking of projects and then d... See more

“The time you spend is really spending time,” he said. “It isn’t wasting time. Then one has to find within that spending of time an allowing oneself to just not feel you’re wasting it if you’re just existing for the moment. Just exist.

the answer cannot be to retreat from relationships. It has to be to take them more seriously. To kill that urge to run and avoid. Because we’ve got two choices here—crumble under the weight of this thing or go all in, against the odds. Forget pretending that love and family aren’t important, that they are oppressive, that loving ourselves is enough... See more

We’re not meant to move through life alone, especially when in transition. We need mirrors—people who reflect back the parts of ourselves we can’t yet see. We need guides who have walked the path before. We need people to hold us lovingly and nonjudgmental so that we can learn to hold ourselves in the same way.

It’s also helpful to have others by ou... See more