Sublime

He reported that she was always involved with the kids. With no friends of her own, she turned to her children for companionship and affirmation of her worth.

As a couples therapist, I have three sources of information: what the partners report about themselves and each other, how they behave in front of me, and how I feel witnessing their behavior.

Para-alcoholics are reactors rather than actors.

Sex addicts who were not abused as children may have had more subtle forms of sexualization projected on them by a parent or they may have felt so unloved or undesirable that they now look to sexual contact as a quick source of comfort.

It has long been my observation that women who tend to be “groupies” or who gravitate to situations in which they seduce and get involved with unavailable men are women who unconsciously believe that they don’t deserve to have relationships based on mutuality. Such beliefs usually turn out to be the result of some type of survivor or separation

aberration

As the therapist charged to help the pair move back into closeness, I usually make a determination whether the primary problem is the character of the cheater or the state of their union or both. It

By using names that highlight each pattern’s safety strategy, I am also emphasizing the fact that a pattern is something a person does to protect themselves when in distress, not something they are.