The 5 Personality Patterns: Your Guide to Understanding Yourself and Others and Developing Emotional Maturity

The most important thing you can do to help others get out of pattern is to get yourself out of pattern. Whenever you’re in pattern, you’re putting a strain on everyone around you, and that strain tends to put them into pattern, also. So the biggest favor you can do for all of your friends, family, and co-workers is to be in presence, rather than i

As your old emotional reactivity recedes, your attention becomes more stable. Instead of flitting away into endless reactions, it stays more easily in the present. Without a thousand unintentional side trips, all of life becomes easier. This stabilizing of attention is immensely valuable — in fact, it is the goal of many meditation and attention pr

The world needs your essence. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you’re not important. No one else can sing your song. No one else can bring your gifts to the world. We need you.

You can also learn the basics by reading The EFT Comprehensive Training Resource, Level 1 by Ann Adams and Karin Davidson. When I teach EFT, that’s the book I recommend to my students.

The tool that I have found to be the quickest, easiest, and most effective is something called Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT. It involves tapping on your body’s energy meridians to clear out the energetic disruptions caused by overwhelming and traumatic experiences. Often, this technique will clear out the sense of overwhelm and restore your

Second, as long as you’re in pattern, your response will be dictated by the pattern. It will be the automatic response of the pattern, even though that response is probably not the best choice right now.

First, the survival pattern is distorting your perceptions and your experience. The upset may not be nearly as bad as it appears to be through the filter of the pattern. And even if it is that bad, you still need to see it clearly to figure out the best way to respond to it.

To get out of your reaction and return to the present, put the story aside. Shift your attention from the story and its emotions to your raw perceptual experience right now

As you think about these different combinations of patterns, remember that the best option is to not be in any pattern at all. The goal is presence, a presence which includes the capacities and skills you have honed while in your patterns but leaves you free to use those gifts consciously.