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When ministering to others in such circumstances, good conversationalists adopt the posture of a midwife. A midwife is there not to give birth but simply to assist the other person in their own creation. In conversation, a midwife is there not to lead with insights but to receive and build on the insights the other person is developing. The midwife
... See moreDavid Brooks • How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
aproximar-se de alguém que não quer compartilhar nada com você não precisa começar por qualquer atitude bondosa de auxílio, solidariedade ou ajuda. Pelo contrário, brinque de bancar o escravo do mestre. Peça que ele dê mais explicações e crie mais argumentos, como se ele fosse o professor e você o aluno. Nunca tente estabelecer as regras do jogo e
... See moreChristian Dunker • O palhaço e o psicanalista: Como escutar os outros pode transformar vidas (Portuguese Edition)
As we’ve seen, all criticism, attack, insults, and judgments vanish when we focus attention on hearing the feelings and needs behind a message. The more we practice in this way, the more we realize a simple truth: behind all those messages we’ve allowed ourselves to be intimidated by are just individuals with unmet needs appealing to us to contribu
... See moreMarshall B. Rosenberg • Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships (Nonviolent Communication Guides)
It's Not All About "Me": The Top Ten Techniques for Building Quick Rapport with Anyone
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The job of parents is to model. Modeling includes how to be a man or woman; how to relate intimately to another person; how to acknowledge and express emotions; how to fight fairly; how to have physical, emotional and intellectual boundaries; how to communicate; how to cope and survive life’s unending problems; how to be self-disciplined; and how t
... See moreJohn Bradshaw • Healing the Shame That Binds You
The word she taught them was praise. She told them that every day, they must catch each member of the family doing something right, and say so, specifically, positively and thankfully. She did not go into deep explanations, but it was clear what she was doing. She was creating, within each home, an atmosphere of mutual regard and continuous positiv
... See moreJonathan Sacks • To Heal a Fractured World: The Ethics of Responsibility
I first encountered re-parenting exercises in a seminar handout written by Dr. Richard Landis, a neo-Ericksonian therapist from Southern California. Dr. Landis recommends imagining a meadow in a vivid, multi-sensory way, focusing on unresolved issues and feelings from the past and then looking over to the side of the meadow to see a child with the
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