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However, many work teams as well as couples have a list of undiscussables, issues they avoid broaching at all costs in order to preserve a modicum of peace, to preserve the relationship. In reality, the relationship steadily deteriorates for lack of the very conversations they so carefully avoid. It’s difficult to raise the level if the slide has l
... See moreSusan Scott • Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time
The second dimension involves telling people when their work isn’t good enough—and when it is; when they are not going to get that new role they wanted, or when you’re going to hire a new boss “over” them; when the results don’t justify further investment in what they’re working on. Delivering hard feedback, making hard calls about who does what on
... See moreKim Scott • Radical Candor: Be a Kick-Ass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity
Step 8‐S: Stuck Again If you realize that changing the wants and offers has just led to another impasse, then it is time to really shift gears. You have made two passes at reaching agreement that aren't working, so you should ask yourself whether the way you are working with the client and the relationship between you and the client might not be th
... See morePeter Block • Flawless Consulting: A Guide to Getting Your Expertise Used
Once the members of my CEO groups reflected on the path that led them to a disappointing or difficult point and place in time, they remembered, often in vivid detail, the conversations that set things in motion, ensuring that they would end up exactly where they found themselves. They lost that customer, that employee, the cohesiveness of their tea
... See moreSusan Scott • Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life One Conversation at a Time
So, I already told you that I’m on ________ side of this issue. What pisses you most off about people like me?
So, you told me that you believe _______ politically. What were two big moments in your life that influenced that belief?
What’s one thing that government either is or isn’t doing right now that, if it were to change tomorrow, would have the
... See more- Being Unapproachable
Roger Fisher • Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
Mark Zuckerberg • The Tim Ferriss Show Transcripts: Mark Zuckerberg on Long-Term Strategy, Business and Parenting Principles, Personal Energy Management, Building the Metaverse, Seeking Awe, the Role of Religion, Solving Deep Technical Challenges (e.g., AR), and More (#582)
Check for distortions. Spend some quiet time weighing their attack on your judgment or arrogance against other information you have about yourself. Check for denial. In what ways is what they are saying true? Check for exaggerations. What is the worst that could happen here? And what might you do right now to turn the conversation around?
Roger Fisher • Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most
Third, ask for a temporary agreement to engage in truthseeking. If someone is off-loading emotion to us, we can ask them if they are just looking to vent or if they are looking for advice.