juliana ong

The question is not whether women have permission to forego longstanding marriages and relationships to pursue a regular churn of sexual and romantic partners, in an effort to achieve real satisfaction and happiness. The answer to that was already yes. The more relevant question is, will the women who attempt this actually achieve satisfaction and... See more

What I can do, what I’m trying to do, is put into words how hard it is to be without religion. To feel your way through this world without moral guidance. To exist without any sense that you belong to something bigger. To have nothing to atone for; nobody to feel indebted to. And to show that yes, we might not be shackled to old-fashioned morality... See more

And so the trick is, can you force yourself to be absolutely unsparingly realistic about what’s actually best for you?

The theologian Paul Tillich declared that faith is “the state of being ultimately concerned.” He argued that because each person has something of ultimate concern that defines their life and identity, all people are religious—even the atheist. Every person has something in their life that functions as their god. For some, this god-function is

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“It sounds like you typically look for a connection that starts at a 10/10. Maybe what you want is something that starts at a 7/10.” I didn’t like hearing this. But it makes a ton of sense. When you are love-drunk you are also drunk-drunk. You’re not really seeing the person, you’re seeing your own phosphorescence.

It is very tempting to believe that because you are twenty-something and struggling, the world is conspiring against you. But sometimes, the pain we feel in life is not from people holding us back, but our own inability to deal with their indifference.3 In other words: no one is out to get you. They just don’t care that much. This is both a little... See more

I think a lot about the fluctuations of belief—the inevitable up and downs of maintaining engagement with something over long periods of time. Most people seem to think that love is unchanging versus merely enduring, that if you’re really passionate about something you wake up excited to do it every day. I don’t believe that’s true. In fact, it... See more

A team of psychologists found that the link between authenticity in relationships and relationship satisfaction is very strong. For instance, people who strongly agreed with statements such as “I share my deepest thoughts with my partner even if there’s a chance he/she won’t understand them” reported being particularly happy in their relationships.

“The ultimate question that I have: how can we create cities that are big enough to give people economic opportunity, but small enough to give people love and others in their lives that touch their hearts?”