what even is perfectionism??
boy, this single word sure does mean a lot of things to a lot of people, huh?
by rob hardy · updated 10d ago
what even is perfectionism??
boy, this single word sure does mean a lot of things to a lot of people, huh?
by rob hardy · updated 10d ago
As a unitary construct, perfectionism indiscriminately mingles idealism, introversion, preoccupation with one's flaws, fear of not being able to live up to others' expectations, and making unfair demands of others.
rob hardy added 11d ago
In actuality, perfectionism must be seen as a potent force capable of bringing intense pain, frustration and paralysis, or incredible satisfaction and creative contribution, depending upon how it is channeled. It has the potential to lead to professional fulfillment and spiritual development, but if the energy is diverted by self-doubt and lack of
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Adler (1973) regarded perfectionism as an indispensable part of life, a striving to rise above feelings of dependency and helplessness. Understanding one’s personal power, for Adler, involved maximizing one’s abilities and using them for the good of society. Maslow (1971) equated the full realization of one’s potential with the absence of neurosis.
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Perfection is a paradox—you can never become perfect, and you already are perfect. A perfectionist in an adaptive mindset believes both those statements are true. A perfectionist in a maladaptive mindset believes both those statements are false.
rob hardy added 14d ago
If you’re a perfectionist, you want more of something. What is it? Why do you want that? How do you imagine getting what you want will make you feel? Perfectionism invites a deep, unending exploration of who you are and what you most desire from this life.
rob hardy added 14d ago
rob hardy added 14d ago
Perfectionism is, at its core, about trying to earn approval. Most perfectionists grew up being praised for achievement and performance (grades, manners, rule following, people pleasing, appearance, sports). Somewhere along the way, they adopted this dangerous and debilitating belief system: I am what I accomplish and how well I accomplish it. Plea
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A perfectionist in a maladaptive mindset feels as if they already “lost” at being whole, good enough, or acceptable as they are. Maladaptive perfectionists strive to achieve goals (including interpersonal goals like people-pleasing) in the hope that others don’t feel empty-handed in their presence.
rob hardy added 14d ago