love and dating

But that’s online dating, I’ve always thought: random and chaotic and terrible and weird and then — with time or patience — transformative.

Has love fallen into the realm of planned obsolescence? Where beautifully packaged, terribly fragile emotions are evidence of having reached the summit of our aspirations, only to be left yearning, craving that next big hit? Desire is the newest addiction. The feeling of “want” being much more thrilling than the comfort of being satisfied. Craving... See more

I’m always thinking about that Raúl Zurita quote that people put on Tumblr: Toda declaración de amor es urgente porque vamos a morir [every declaration of love is urgent because we’re going to die]. In real life, obviously, you cannot declare love to just anyone. You have to go with the flow, wait on other people’s time, accept their ambivalence,... See more

When you talk about people you like, or rather when you talk about that thing that happens between you —you have to transform a very complex impression into a string of words. Some relationships can easily be compressed into a compelling string of words. This is usually because they conform to some sort of trope of how romance should look. In my... See more

The seeds of intimacy are time and repetition. We choose each other again and again, and so create a community of two.