love and dating

When you talk about people you like, or rather when you talk about that thing that happens between you —you have to transform a very complex impression into a string of words. Some relationships can easily be compressed into a compelling string of words. This is usually because they conform to some sort of trope of how romance should look. In my... See more

Becoming a vehicle for capitalistic desires of abundance and overconsumption. We’re asking, what would an underconsumption-core of love look like? What if we could take only what we required in the moment, better able to understand ourselves and our needs in the context of the present?

To be known is to be seen. You bring out a different side in yourself when you’re with that person. Some people make you more talkative, more secure, more experimental. In Winterson’s The Passion, Henri says this about love but I think it’s just as resonant of friendship: It is as though I wrote in a foreign language that I am suddenly able to... See more

I’m always thinking about that Raúl Zurita quote that people put on Tumblr: Toda declaración de amor es urgente porque vamos a morir [every declaration of love is urgent because we’re going to die]. In real life, obviously, you cannot declare love to just anyone. You have to go with the flow, wait on other people’s time, accept their ambivalence,... See more

Who we choose to orbit defines, over time, the texture and colour palette of our becoming. Love becomes a technology of transformation, a living interface between selves. To love well is to take part in someone else’s unfolding, even as they take part in yours.

I’ll invest in the love between us, even when there’s no guarantee of permanence. That’s the tax of living. That’s the cost for feeling any sort of aliveness or tenderness. There’s no insurance on your experience. No way to backstop the loss.