intimacy

Don’t take the differences personally

The problem is that before marriage, we rarely delve into our complexities. Whenever casual relationships threaten to reveal our flaws, we blame our partners and call it a day

We need to swap the Romantic view for a tragic (and at points comedic) awareness that every human will frustrate, anger, annoy, madden and disappoint us — and we will (without any malice) do the same to them. There can be no end to our sense of emptiness and incompleteness. But none of this is unusual or grounds for divorce. Choosing whom to commit

The present lover makes their partner feel as though they are the only thing in the universe when they are with them. They offer their consciousness, unguarded heart, and undivided attention freely and without obligation. This leads to profoundly fulfilling sex and love.

Good sex consists of two people taking full responsibility for meeting their own needs. It has no goal. It is free of agendas and expectations. Rather than being a performance, it is an unfolding of sexual energy.

Containment — “A military strategy to stop the expansion of an enemy. It is best known as the Cold War policy of the United States and its allies to prevent the spread of communism abroad.”

One of the privileges of being on our own is therefore the sincere impression that we are really quite easy to live with.