Sublime

He has a kind, round face and the relaxed, easygoing manner of someone who’s spent most of his life in California.

In every crowd there are Diminishers and there are Illuminators. Diminishers make people feel small and unseen. They see other people as things to be used, not as persons to be befriended. They stereotype and ignore. They are so involved with themselves that other people are just not on their radar screen. Illuminators, on the other hand, have a pe

A few years ago I heard Jerome Kagan, a distinguished emeritus professor of child psychology at Harvard, say to the Dalai Lama that for every act of cruelty in this world there are hundreds of small acts of kindness and connection. His conclusion: “To be benevolent rather than malevolent is probably a true feature of our species.” Being able to fee

concern, or shifts in moods in group settings, the more skilled you will be in maneuvering through the social wilds of your life.

This is what Dan Siegel refers to as the window of tolerance. In this zone, your body can hold more energy—both yours and others—and it’s also where karmic change, sublime connection, and profound inspiration exist. For example, your capacity to withstand and hold a feminine storm of emotion—especially if directed at you—and then powerfully choose

Over sixty years ago, Carl Rogers, a pioneer in psychotherapy research, demonstrated that improvement in therapy was associated with a triad of therapist behaviors: genuineness, accurate empathy, and unconditional positive regard.

Visitor: May have concern for no one else, seeks novelty or fun experiences. Novice: Concern for individual self, seeks personal achievement and legitimacy. Member: Concern for one’s peer group, seeks success and respect for the group. Elder: Concern for everyone in the tribe everywhere, seeks the whole tribe’s success and respect. Principal elder:

These are the people who want to make sure that everyone in the group is feeling included and happy. They are very attuned to the feeling states and needs of others and very generous in filling those needs. They are good at listening and are kind, supportive, and helpful.

standard psychological Attachment Scale that measures your social style