Sublime

In every crowd there are Diminishers and there are Illuminators. Diminishers make people feel small and unseen. They see other people as things to be used, not as persons to be befriended. They stereotype and ignore. They are so involved with themselves that other people are just not on their radar screen. Illuminators, on the other hand, have a pe

I, Michelle, am willing to change my patterns in romantic relationships. I commit to seeing my partner as equal to everything and everyone else I love in my life. I promise not to make an idol of him, and to honor him for his inner greatness rather than his frame. I forgive myself and him for my ego’s illusions. From this day forward, I commit to t

provide? He now viewed a successful relationship as one in which both people had recognized the best of what the other person had to offer and had chosen to value it as well.

Paradoxically, the people who trust themselves the most are usually the people who have betrayed themselves the most profoundly, but then made the decision to walk themselves home—inch by inch—to their authentic selves.

Who I Want To Be: I want to show up in life in such a way that you feel greeted in my presence. Welcomed. Worthy. Accepted. That means when I see you I start with love. It means I refuse to wait until my ego can determine your value to me. Forgive me for my impulse to judge, I want to unlearn that behavior. The truth is that you are human—my sister

Being an Illuminator, seeing other people in all their fullness, doesn’t just happen. It’s a craft, a set of skills, a way of life. Other cultures have words for this way of being. The Koreans call it nunchi, the ability to be sensitive to other people’s moods and thoughts. The Germans (of course) have a word for it: herzensbildung, training one’s

“You’ve meant a lot to me. Help me know what you need, and what part I can play with my own resources.”