drena

We all spend time on the low rungs: ⬥ In case you’re thinking, “I’m a really smart person, so I’m safe from the low rungs,” Adam Grant has bad news for you: “Research reveals that the higher you score on an IQ test, the more likely you are to fall for stereotypes, because you’re faster at recognizing patterns. And recent experiments suggest that th

Every time we find ourselves arguing, running away, or otherwise acting in an ineffective way, it’s because we don’t know how to share meaning. Instead of engaging in healthy dialogue, we play costly games. For instance, sometimes we move to silence. We play Salute and Stay Mute. That is, we don’t confront people in positions of authority. Or at ho

“But,” she continued, “I’ve learned that when my emotions take over, the best way to get back into control is to focus on a simple question.” At this point she had our full attention. Could asking yourself a single question truly transform your emotions the way we had witnessed it happening with Greta? And if so, what question should you ask? She c

⬥My personal favorite part of the document: The AMA says that “Low-income people have the highest level of coronary artery disease in the United States” should be swapped out for “People underpaid and forced into poverty as a result of banking policies, real estate developers gentrifying neighborhoods, and corporations weakening the power of labor

Aha! I’ve shifted from planning a great vacation to winning an argument.” Once you humbly acknowledge the shifting desires of your heart, you can make conscious choices to change them. The fastest way to free yourself of a hurtful motive is to simply admit you’ve got it. When you name the game, you can stop playing it. Now ask, “What do I really wa

When we face Crucial Conversations, we have three broad options: • We can avoid them. • We can face them and handle them poorly. • We can face them and handle them well.

Think big. Read about the universe. Nothing makes hatred seem more ridiculous than internalizing how vast time and space are. Doing so makes me want to turn to anyone who will listen and hug them and say, “We both exist! On the same tiny planet at the same exact time! Hi!”