The way I think about coaching is very much how I think about parenting, and I think it translates in lots of other places, that your ability to drive change is about the quality of your relationship, not your hierarchy.
Your milieu is not the same as your sister’s. It is an ever-shifting, individual configuration of information flows. The Twitter feed you have curated is a milieu. Your friend group (which is not the same as the friend groups of the other people in that group!) is a milieu.
It is by changing your milieu that you change yourself.
People often destroy their relationships over their whims. "He doesn't go rock climbing with me." "She doesn't do this specific thing when we're having sex." They start to obsess over this lack, mistaking a flight of fancy for a great and vacuous unfulfilled desire that if satisfied, will fix everything. What could have been summarily dismissed... See more
It is our relationships are the most impactful in creating overall life satisfaction. Yet few of us are putting intentional effort to make sure that they actually bring a satisfaction. Most people are expecting relationships to be satisfying automatically without having to put in intentional work.
All relationships go... See more