Hmmm

focus your time and energy on what you want to see more of

I used to write down "What would I do if I really loved myself?" Sometimes that's hard, especially for someone who has been through a lot of trauma. It can be difficult to even imagine what that would look like. Instead, I now use inverted thinking. What would I do if I really hated myself? What if I wanted myself to lose out as much as possible? W... See more

Here’s Gendlin’s Focusing check from CFAR:

Say aloud “Everything in my life is fine,” or “I’m on track with all of my goals.”

Pay attention to the sensations in your belly, chest, and throat. If you’re like most people, something will catch or react weirdly to the statement.

Try to get a sense of what the feeling “sees,” and write it down.

Imagine sett

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Men sometimes say they need “precise instructions” from their wives or girlfriends on how to please them and keep them happy. But, a man needs "precise instructions" from a woman about how to relate to her or conduct himself, he's already coming from a disempowered, boy-like

Your fantasies about another are never actually about that person. They are actually about you, your desires, wishes, unmet needs projected onto that person, continual stories where that person is not really a character, but a prop.