Controlling your emotions

Just because somebody asked you a question doesn’t mean you have to answer it. Dramatic people are fueled by reactions. When you stop reacting, they go away. Same goes for yourself. Your emotions insist they need you to respond. When you ignore the urges, they go away too.

Observe when you’re angry—anger is a loss of control over the situation. Anger is a contract you make with yourself to be in physical and mental and emotional turmoil until reality changes. [1]

Don’t get angry. How do you control your anger? Al Bernstein recommends pretending you are talking to a child. You wouldn’t try to rationalize with a screaming child, and you wouldn’t get angry with them for yelling. You’d just dismiss the hysterics and deal with the underlying problem.

短絡的に考えることなく、暴力とは距離を置き、人の悪口やとげとげしい言葉遣いを避ける。いつでも淡々と穏やかでいることで自分も心地よくなると知っているからだ。

自分で自分の機嫌を支配する

嫌なことがあると他人に八つ当たりしたり、感情のコントロールができず、 怒りをぶちまけたりする人がいますが、自らの人生を台無しにする行為です。 自分がいつも上機嫌でいられるようにするのは、自分自身の役目です。 幸せを 感じるか、感じないかも、あなたの心がつくり出すものなのです。 ゆううつ 例えば、雨が降っていて、「嫌だなぁ」と思い一日憂鬱に過ごすのか、「農作 物や自然にとって恵みの雨だ」と考えて感謝の気持ちで過ごすのかでは、まっ たく別の世界が心の中に生まれます。 自分の感情をコントロールして、常に機嫌のいい自分でいることです。

if you focus on your anger when someone insults you, you’re likely to communicate violently by hurling an insult right back. But if you focus on the feelings and needs you have in common, you might recognize that insulting you was this person’s way of expressing their insecurity and their need for self-esteem. Keeping your attention on that common

You can also learn to regulate your emotions through meditation and mindfulness practice. Mindful individuals have more emotional awareness, are more understanding, more accepting, and can better cope with being in a shitty mood.14,15 People who are prone to outbursts of anger or sadness are better able to regulate and control their emotions with t