is your perfectionism coming from fear or from love? love-based perfectionism sounds like: - "I want to make this better" - "I can see how beautiful this could be" - "it'd be even more fun if I could do it this way" fear-based perfectionism sounds like: - "I need to make this better" - "I'm scared to put bad work into the world" - "I'd finally feel relief if I could just get this right" love-based perfectionism can be indulged, as it tends to lead you to greater heights with fear-based perfectionism, you have an opportunity to understand the underlying fear (e.g. "if I'm not competent, I'm not worthy of love") and move towards it with loving curiosity, so it can start to relax

Next, take it a step further and ask yourself, ‘Where does this fear come from?’ Is it a ‘me’ reason or a ‘them’ reason? ‘Me’ reasons are fears associated with your perception of your ability. For example, being scared that you’re not good enough or not well prepared enough to start. ‘Them’ reasons are fears associated with how other people will
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Perfectionism is not self-improvement. Perfectionism is, at its core, about trying to earn approval and acceptance. Most perfectionists were raised being praised for achievement and performance (grades, manners, rule-following, people-pleasing, appearance, sports). Somewhere along the way, we adopt this dangerous and debilitating belief system: I
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