Why We Dread (and Ditch) Our Own Social Plans, Plus 3 Tools to Try

don’t mistake possibility for probability . Worst-case scenarios are possible in this universe, but they’re not what will probably happen.

Our brain reasons, “If I follow the rules and do everything right, I’ll be accepted—or at least not rejected.”

Regarding anxiety as “just part of the script” helps us see it not as a screaming alarm system we have to heed, but as a phenomenon that simply plays out in the theater of our mind. All these thoughts—”I don’t want to go,” “I should stay home because I value self-care”--are just passing through.

“Ooh, here’s the part where I think I should stay home... See more

It feels like there are so many contradictory rules: we have to ask questions but also talk about ourselves. We have to be cool but not detached. We have to be smart and informed but not a pretentious know-it-all.