Emotional Endurance

Endurance is a form of trust, in your capacity over time to absorb the stresses and extremes of the present. I say trust because the math in the moment may break: the opposition overwhelming, your resources faint. So you make eye contact with the enemy. You put down your spear. You turn your back and wait for the tension to break. The quality that ... See more

Emotional intelligence is the ability to know what I’m feeling in any moment, and have a receptive relationship with the feeling, so it goes through my body. It doesn’t get stuck. If the feeling gets stuck, which is what happens with most people, it ultimately calcifies and turns into a mood. So anger that isn’t felt and released in less than 90 se... See more

Emotional competence requires • the capacity to feel our emotions, so that we are aware when we are experiencing stress; • the ability to express our emotions effectively and thereby to assert our needs and to maintain the integrity of our emotional boundaries; • the facility to distinguish between psychological reactions that are pertinent to the ... See more

Mental toughness is a skill and like any skill it can be developed. Learning how to overcome fear is just like building a new habit. Start small and increase slowly.

But these activities are all separate from the feelings needed to fully and sustainably participate: the courage, optimism, trust, love, intimacy, curiosity. The resilience to push through the inevitable feelings of fear, overwhelm, frustration, and hurt. The stamina to go through cycles of all of these feelings and more, again and again, and conti... See more

I work with people who have limited emotional vocabulary and as a result the intensity of their negative emotions and experiences is heightened because they can't describe their feelings (especially their negative feelings). That's why this list is heavily focused on negative emotions/ experiences. Being able to clearly identify how we are feeling ... See more