you ask what people’s underlying interests are – what do they need – then you’re more likely to get to find an imaginative solution.’ That means asking probing, penetrating questions which force the other party off their prepared script, and encourage them to open up about the pressures on them from their own side. It also means listening intently

What about this is important to you? How can I help to make this better for us? How would you like me to proceed? What is it that brought us into this situation? How can we solve this problem? What’s the objective? / What are we trying to accomplish here? How am I supposed to do that?

“What do your colleagues see as their main challenges in this area?”