Sublime

TO BETTER UNDERSTAND yourself as a system, examine three circles of your loyalties:

‘narcissism of minor differences’, and he said its root lay in the aggressiveness which civilisation had insisted we must sacrifice for the sake of the advantages it offered, but which was always there inside us, crouching below the surface, waiting for the occasion of its violent release.

Our work begins with the assumption that there is no reason to exercise leadership, to have a courageous conversation with a boss or a spouse, for example, or to take a risk on a new idea, unless you care about something deeply.

These social breakthroughs of heidelbergensis reflect a side of human psychology that [5]I call the “hero instinct.” While the peer instinct encodes what most people in the group do and prompts conformity, the hero instinct registers what the most respected people do and stirs aspirations to contribute similarly.

By 1956, the sociologist William H. Whyte saw a “decline of the Protestant ethic” and the rise of “the organization man,” for whom conformity was prized over initiative.

When strategic decisions need to be made, the perspectives of frontline people are considered.

Our identity is no longer fused with our rank and title; instead it is fused with our need to be seen as competent and successful, ready for the next promotion.

Knowing about the attachment styles empowers people to harness their biology to work for them rather than against them.

The male mind appears to be innately tribal—that is, structured in advance of experience so that boys and men enjoy doing the sorts of things that lead to group cohesion and success in conflicts between groups (including warfare).20 The virtue of loyalty matters a great deal to both sexes, though the objects of loyalty tend to be teams and coalitio