Sublime

discipline. People will promise themselves not to get too involved, and find that their promise melts when their relational hunger meets a person they desire.

For so-called cheats (who will most likely have to pay a very heavy price indeed for going to bed with another person), sex can have remarkably little to do with ‘sex’. It is an activity continuous with a range of non-physical needs for tenderness, acceptance, care and companionship. It is an attempt, negotiated through the body but focused on the

Problems sometime arise when a man is caught by his female partner looking at pornography, which the partner views as cheating. I have had women tell me in my office that finding his porn is like finding him in bed with another woman. This is a subtler and often more challenging problem than if his partner had found him in bed with another woman.

Women in marriage and LTRs want to push past that nagging hypergamic competition anxiety; they want security, not just financial, but emotional, and the security that comes from a locked in commitment in knowing they are the only source of sex & intimacy for their spouse/ partner.

Much of my clinical and academic work involves helping individuals develop the adult component of the psychological repertoire of behavior. This is usually the aspect that is missing and contributing to the lack of intimacy in their marital relationship.

Betrayal is, fundamentally, any act or life choice that doesn’t prioritize the commitment and put the partner “before all others.” Nonsexual betrayals can devastate a relationship as thoroughly as a sexual affair. Some common forms of deceit include being emotionally distant, siding with a parent against one’s mate, disrespecting the partner, and b

If you’re secure, you’re very reliable, consistent, and trustworthy. You don’t try to dodge intimacy or go nuts over your relationships.

First find a good match, then fall in love. Above all, don’t think you’ve “fallen in love” only to learn too late that it’s a bad match.