karaa

“Perfectionism is a self destructive and addictive belief system that fuels this primary thought: If I look perfect, and do everything perfectly, I can avoid or minimize the painful feelings of shame, judgment, and blame.”

The fundamental change we need is a shift from a feeling- centered approach to decisions to a purpose- centered approach. The question isn’t “What do I feel like doing?” but, rather, “what needs to be done?” All the time management systems in the world won’t really help us very much until we’ve developed the capacity to make decisions based on

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If I were to listen to stories about “that bad person” or “poor me,” and sympathize with your plight by saying things like, “That must have been tough,” or “It’s not your fault at all,” it is true that you might get some temporary solace. And you might even have a sense of satisfaction that it was good to get counseling, or good to consult this

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Is it all right to just stay away from other people, and shut oneself up in one’s room? No, it is not all right. It is not all right at all. The reason it is not is that all the joy of humanity comes from interpersonal relationships too. A person living “all alone in the universe” would have to lead a life that is utterly flat and featureless, with

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The difficulty in speaking openly is caused, not by the desire for approval as such, but by resistance to that desire. By expressing the desire either aloud to the person concerned or internally, we increase the sense of self-respect and autonomy. We also free the mind to be aware that there is a wider context, other needs, and that the most

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