# Recovery

The AA motto— To Thine Own Self Be True —is not a tagline. It’s the heartbeat of the 12 Steps, the Traditions, and the Concepts. It’s not always evident on the surface, but the principles embedded in the 12 Steps are designed to bring a person home to themselves. Not to some idealized version of self-improvement, but to the original self. The essen... See more

Because I can't change a tire. I can't do my taxes. I can't light a grill. I usually can't hang a picture without creating holes the size of silver dollars in the drywall. (But the few times I have done it successfully, man, oh, man, did I feel like I could save us all.) I can't camp. Or ski. Or climb up ladders higher than six feet. I speak no oth... See more

I do not believe in fate. I do not believe in a higher power that runs my life like a puppet master. But I do believe that it’s up to me to see, hear, feel HP in my life (step 11). It will take me a while to fully grasp the lessons I have learned through this journey.

I am willing to not know, look stupid, make an ass of myself, get it wrong, be awkward, be uncomfortable.

I am willing to do all that so I CAN BE FREE.

What other people might think seems like vital information when you have rarely had a felt sense of belonging in the world. I wonder what it's like to just get out of bed, put clothes on, grab your keys, walk out of the house, go to a place, and not think anything of it. Like, not think about any of it. AT ALL.

is a three-step process that takes you from making a mistake to moving beyond it.

1. Own your mistake. To do this, say to yourself, “I made a mistake. I’m human. I will take responsibility for it and I will work my way through this.” Then check your emotions. Name what you are feeling.


2. Show yourself compassion. Think through how this mistake happened.

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I think I became an alcoholic because I was ashamed of me. I was afraid to be me.

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My drinking grew from fearing what the Universe had in store for me; Sobriety has been accepting what the Universe has in store for me.

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Go to bed earlier. Wake up and move right away. Find sunlight and get in it. Even when you feel tired, go on a walk. Cheer yourself on the entire time. These small shifts are creating an entirely new version of yourself. Commit to them, and you’ll be a different person.