on patriarchy
I considered the way that we treat animals like objects, as if their bodies are empty containers, their instinct to survive rattling like a marble at the bottom. The more we want to exploit a body, the less humanity we allow it. Here I had been believing my own body an object that I could yield to others without harming.
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
If my body had been a passive machine from which men made withdrawals, like an ATM whose code they were handed on the day of their first erection, then with her it was a winning slot machine, screaming jangly music and spewing coins.
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
he erotic is a resource within each of us that lies in a deeply female and spiritual plane, firmly rooted in the power of our unexpressed or unrecognized feeling. In order to perpetuate itself, every oppression must corrupt or distort those various sources of power within the culture of the oppressed that can provide energy for change. For women,... See more
Audre Lorde. • Uses of the Erotic: The Erotic as Power
Taking on the cause of violence against women, but associating it with migrant men, is a tactic that we've seen the far right using throughout time. So this is nothing new. Gender based violence is overwhelmingly perpetrated by people that the victim knows...The trope of Stranger Danger is really deployed to foment racist attitudes and beliefs...... See more
Feminism is being co-opted by the far-right again, this time to target migrants
Perhaps the most powerful encouragement for empty consent is that saying no isn’t nice. Women friends of mine who identify as feminists convulse with apology when they decline an invitation from a friend, so I suppose it’s no wonder that when it comes to sex, as Jenny put it, “It would have made me extremely anxious to set that boundary when it was
... See moreMelissa Febos • Girlhood
A trans woman friend of mine recently explained to me how the technique for training your voice to sound more feminine has a lot to do “with speaking less or asking more questions or deferring to other people more.”
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
Politicians and commentators who have spent decades undermining women’s rights suddenly discover a deep concern for women only when that fear and concern can be blamed on migrants.
Not because chivalry has risen from the dead. But because fear is useful, and the feminist fight carries cultural weight.
This is nothing but propaganda wrapped in shiny... See more
Not because chivalry has risen from the dead. But because fear is useful, and the feminist fight carries cultural weight.
This is nothing but propaganda wrapped in shiny... See more
let's talk about weaponising feminism
both men and women prioritize the comfort and well-being of men over women’s safety, comfort, even the truth of their bodily experience.
Melissa Febos • Girlhood
Lying, as one form of acting out, is a way they articulate ongoing rage at the failure of love’s promise. To embrace patriarchy, they must actively surrender the longing to love.