learning to lose
and getting to grips with grief — in any and every way, shape and size it shows up in life.
learning to lose
When you lose someone, in whatever capacity, you lose a universe of tiny things that existed between you. And perhaps what is worse, you also lose the potential that universe has to expand.
To let go, when you know you have to is like choosing both grief and hope. Hope that you have control over your life, hope that there is something that is more in alignment for you out there. But you are giving up the possibility of the known joy. There must have been something you are letting go of that is meaningful and beautiful. Letting go, for
... See moresource People I’ve Loved
Gratitude becomes the color with which I paint your memory; this is intentional. Change is hard for me becomes change is a human inevitability, but I can see how your presence has guided the trajectory. I think of how I am a patchwork quilt of all the people I have loved and of all the people who have loved me. When I drink coffee, I feel the
... See moreWhat I understand now is that I could never escape from my love for S, nor would I want to. To be loved by him, to love and care for him, is neither my birthright or destiny. It’s the groove worn into the earth by repetitive pacing over thousands of days. It’s the room I’m locked in that I can never get out of. It’s the room that I would return to... See more
no exit
As long as there is love, there will be grief. The grief of time passing, of life moving on half-finished, of empty spaces that were once bursting with the laughter and energy of people we loved.
As long as there is love there will be grief because grief is love's natural continuation. It shows up in the aisles of stores we once frequented, in the
... See moreLast week I planted an acer in the furthest bed from the house, in honour of our new baby. The sapling is as tall as me and, by all accounts, it can grow forty feet tall. So, in thirty years’ time, if we’re still here I can come back and see this tree in its maturity. But the thought depresses me: in thirty years’ time I’ll be in my mid sixties and
... See moreWilliam Boyd • Any Human Heart
pure love never dies, we just stop updating the context that feeds the immediate feeling.
“Give to someone only as much of you they are able to receive. If their vessel isn’t spacious enough to hold all of you, there will only be an overflow of rejection.”