Fatherhood
A dad needs to be able to contribute a countervailing consideration to mom’s fear: the value of learning to explore with dad as a GPS as needed, so they don’t get too lost.
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
During roughhousing, dads and kids are typically 100 percent energized, laughing, spontaneous, and, yes, silly. The dads were almost always able to distinguish between their son or daughter being excited-scared and scared-scared. When the dad picked up any sense of his son or daughter being scared-scared, he backed off.
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
They have different ways of setting boundaries and enforcing boundaries; exploring in nature; roughhousing; creating teachable moments; challenging the kids’ limits; using hangout time; and different attitudes toward teasing. Researchers have also documented dads’ greater tendencies to • walk a fine line between safety and risk-taking; • juggle the
... See moreJohn Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
The “unlived life” refers to the aspects of a parent’s existence that remain unexplored, unexpressed, or suppressed. These unrealized potentials may stem from various sources, including societal expectations, personal fears, or unresolved traumas.
Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their children than the unlived life of the parent.... See more
Kulwant Saluja • The Unlived Life: Carl Jung’s Profound Insight into Parental Influence
Between quality childcare and longer parental leaves, the bigger contributor to a healthy and productive son is a longer parental leave.
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
being an involved dad creates a “dad brain” that replaces his single-man desires. He’ll experience a decrease in the testosterone previously used in the hunt for sex and recovery after rejection, and an increase in oxytocin emanating from the joys of loving and being loved by an infant who needs him.
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
And that value kicks in early. Toddlers whose dads encouraged exploring (while setting limits) had better social and emotional skills twelve to eighteen months later.17
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
Raising a son is real work, but we have to get this right, because if we don’t teach our sons, the world will. If we don’t teach our sons about women, pornography will. If we don’t teach our sons about friendship, they’ll live a life of loneliness. If we don’t teach our sons about leadership, they’ll be followers all of their lives. Being a father
... See moreDavid Kinnaman • The Intentional Father
“My mom warns and warns; it’s like she ‘cries wolf.’ My dad gives us one warning, and then he becomes the wolf.”
John Gray PhD • The Boy Crisis
Role of a father