The nature of impending fatherhood is that you are doing something that you’re unqualified to do, and then you become qualified while doing it. JOHN GREEN

THE PRINCIPLE If a son does not receive blessing from his father, he will spend the rest of his life trying to earn that blessing. Creating a blessing ceremony will help cement our sons’ identity and heal wounds they have suffered along the way. It is something only we as fathers can give to our sons.

THE PRINCIPLE Young men rarely think long and hard about the decisions and directions they want their lives to take. The horizon of their thinking often extends to the end of their current season and the start of the next. But wise men understand the arc and seasons of a life and seek to live well in each season to minimize regret and maximize joy.

There is a time in the life of every boy when he for the first time takes the backward view of life. Perhaps that is the moment when he crosses the line into manhood. SHERWOOD ANDERSON

THE PRINCIPLE Our goal as fathers is to help our sons discover who God has made and called them to be. We are not to make them in our own image but to help them along the path of grace so that they are renewed in the image of their Creator. This will bring them confidence and vision to move forward.

IMAGINE A FARMER walked down a backcountry road and saw another farmer repairing a fence. His young sons were helping him. “Why are you letting your sons help you?” the first farmer asked. “It’s going to take five times as long. You should just do it yourself.” “Oh, but you’ve made a mistake,” the second farmer said. “You think I’m repairing a

Here is the process for discipling your son: I do, you watch, we talk. I do, you help, we talk. You do, I help, we talk. You do, I watch, we talk. You do, someone else watches.

I borrowed a framework from Dave Ferguson’s book Exponential.

As you are probably seeing by now, this is about your own formation as much as it is about the formation of the young person with whom you’re walking through it. But if you do it, if you commit to the process, courage and confidence will begin to rise in your own spirit too.