One of the things that happens as boys are growing up is they learn about a very restrictive version of masculinity, a list of things that you’re not allowed to do or say. Particularly around emotions: You’re allowed to be angry, and you might be able to cry if something’s really bad — like a sports team you’re on loses a really important game, or... See more
addressing the behavior first or only addressing the behavior is a band-aid solution, whether it’s done through punishment or appeasement. It may stop the behavior in the moment, but it never gets to the root of the issue.
One thing adults conceal about sex they also conceal about drugs: that it can cause great pleasure. That's what makes sex and drugs so dangerous. The desire for them can cloud one's judgement—which is especially frightening when the judgement being clouded is the already wretched judgement of a teenage kid.
as far as I can tell, the main difference between people who are completely overwhelmed with parenting and those who are having a great time raising their kids is that the latter don't really consider it a big deal when their children are upset with a decision they made