decisions vs choices: what's the diff?
spag mol essay idea. something instinctive tells me they’re not the same thing, but it’s going to need further investigation.
decisions vs choices: what's the diff?
James Clear 3-2-1
Freedom to feel and experience the full spectrum of human experience. I don’t want to be arbitrarily chained down in anything I didn’t choose — ever.
(Molly Mielke on Audience of One)
What my friend says sometimes bewilders me because he looks like a thirsty person standing right in front of a glass of water, yet when you suggest maybe he should drink it, he goes, “No, can’t drink that. There is a wall in the way.”
No, there isn’t!!
This makes me realize that what I said earlier in this essay is not enough. You can’t simply list w... See more
No, there isn’t!!
This makes me realize that what I said earlier in this essay is not enough. You can’t simply list w... See more
Henrik Karlsson • An essay in which my friend feels stuck and I suggest relaxing some constraints
I think I secretly prefer treating decisions like irreversible trapdoors. There's a deep relief in having no choice, an absolvement of responsibility. But the truth is that the things that define our lives - our habits, our identities, our relationships - are choices made daily, continually.
Isn't that what defines the romanticised ideal of love that lives in my head? That it's a choice? Every day, every word, every action? We forget that love is a choice because it feels more like gravity. Things fall; why shouldn’t we?
Nobody has to show up with roses, peel fruit, or sacrifice their precious time for another human being. Nobody has to suffer through the weird way you eat or the annoying jokes you make. Nobody has to wake up in the middle of the night, paralysed in fear for the heart they've given away. Yet we choose to anyway.
It's scary to realise that someone could do so for 10 years straight and simply wake up deciding not to make the same choice anymore. And people do. With friends, with lovers, with life itself.
Love is a hundred thousand little and big choices. That's what makes it special, that we can spend a lifetime with someone, across thousands of mornings and kisses and still look forward to the next one, across a thousand annoyances and struggles choose to wake up and do it again, every single time.
Yet, for all the impact this specific choice has had on the trajectory of my life, I value the way it changed my view about choices even more. We often think of choice as a thing. But a choice is not a thing. Our options may be things, but a choice—a choice is an action. It is not just something we have but something we do. This experience brought
... See moreGreg Mckeown • Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less
Building on this, perhaps choices are something we do/act upon, but decisions still sit in that murky realm of intellectual rationalisation. Your choices and decisions can be at odds with each other, and that’s the riskiest place to be.
"Whether a decision is good or bad can change based on how you act after the choice is made.
You can't learn all the lessons beforehand. You learn a lot about what you want in a marriage after getting married. You discover what type of career you enjoy after doing a lot of work. And so it goes in nearly every area of life. In many cases, what you w... See more
You can't learn all the lessons beforehand. You learn a lot about what you want in a marriage after getting married. You discover what type of career you enjoy after doing a lot of work. And so it goes in nearly every area of life. In many cases, what you w... See more
3-2-1: On getting what you deserve, the power of flexibility, and how good decisions are made
“I think about decisions in three ways: hats, haircuts, and tattoos.
Most decisions are like hats. Try one and if you don’t like it, put it back and try another. The cost of a mistake is low, so move quickly and try a bunch of hats.
Some decisions are like haircuts. You can fix a bad one, but it won’t be quick and you might feel foolish for awhile. T... See more
Most decisions are like hats. Try one and if you don’t like it, put it back and try another. The cost of a mistake is low, so move quickly and try a bunch of hats.
Some decisions are like haircuts. You can fix a bad one, but it won’t be quick and you might feel foolish for awhile. T... See more
James Clear • 3-2-1: On hats, haircuts, and tattoos
Who we are, ultimately, is the sum total of decisions we make in a lifetime.
Catherine Price (The Power of Fun)