“Do you want to vent or do you want advice?” Just learning now, after 40 years on earth, that this might be the most important question to ask whenever a friend or loved one is upset.
Want to help someone when they’re anxious? Ask them if they want empathy or they want a solution. Don't offer advice for how to solve a problem to someone who in that moment just wants a pat on the back.
Shane Parrish • Understanding Others' Emotions | Lisa Feldman Barrett
Looking for what someone needs: Do they want comfort? Empathy? Advice? Tough love? (If you don’t know the answer, loop more.) Asking permission. “Would it be okay if I told you how your words affect me?” or “Would you mind if I shared something from my own life?” or “Can I share how I’ve seen others handle this?” Giving something in return. This ca
... See moreCharles Duhigg • Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
Took me a long time to realize solutions aren't always what people want. Sometimes they just want someone to empathize with them. https://t.co/vLpSL2veX3