The Passion Paradox: A Guide to Going All In, Finding Success, and Discovering the Benefits of an Unbalanced Life

“I was just letting my curiosity take me forward and engaging in the things I enjoyed and found interesting.” Fast-forward five years, and Neuman had paid off her law school debt (she was fortunate to have received a scholarship, so the debt wasn’t that massive) and found herself applying to PhD programs in philosophy.

We don’t get hooked on the feeling associated with achievement, we get hooked on the feeling associated with the chase. Dopamine is the molecule of desire and motivation. This simple yet powerful biological truth is responsible for some of history’s greatest achievements, from the survival of the human species yesterday to groundbreaking scientific

“Interest” is really just another way of saying that something captures your attention. When you come across an activity or idea that subtly pulls you toward it, you are faced with a choice: Do you grant yourself permission to lean in and further explore? Or do you let it go, ignoring it and writing it off as a momentary blip of intrigue? If you ch

passion isn’t so straightforward. Yes, passion can be a blessing; it’s a hallmark of mastery and a precursor to great success. But if it’s not pursued thoughtfully and handled carefully, passion can quickly become a curse, something that is far more destructive than it is productive.

A better approach to finding your passion is to lower the bar from perfect to interesting, then give yourself permission to pursue your interests with an open mind.

In the early 1970s, psychologists Edward Deci and Richard Ryan developed a concept called self-determination theory that forever changed how the scientific community viewed motivation. Deci and Ryan found that, contrary to common wisdom (both then and, to a large extent, now), one’s drive to pursue activities is not predominantly reliant on externa

Relatedness: The final component of self-determination theory is one that binds us to others: the need to feel connected to and/or like you are a part of something larger. Humans are social animals.

What are the consequences of such a mind-set? For starters, researchers have found that those who subscribe to a destiny belief system of love are more likely to end relationships when the first hint of conflict occurs; in essence, they decide, This person must not be the one, and move on in search of someone who is the one.2 That’s because under a

Embracing exploration is so important because the path to finding your passion can be long and circuitous, with many wrong turns in the direction of activities, jobs, or other opportunities that initially appeared exhilarating yet proved to be something else. But have the courage to keep on exploring.