To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love. To know how to love someone, we have to understand them. To understand, we need to listen. That person may be our partner, our friend, our sibling, or our child. You can ask, “Dear one, do you think that I understand you enough? Please tell me your difficulties, your suffering, and your

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In love, I recently realized that the thing I value most is emotional connection. Connection is of course ineffable, and for a long time my lack of vocabulary prevented me from understanding how much I needed it. It’s that warm, fluid feeling, that sense of boundarylessness between two people, the possibility of total understanding. I care about a ... See more