The 5 Personality Patterns: Your Guide to Understanding Yourself and Others and Developing Emotional Maturity

All the survival patterns are skill-based, since the successful use of any pattern depends on having the skills needed to make it work.

Fear, need, pain, weakness, and vulnerability are projected onto others, often accompanied by an attitude of contempt for them.

The gifts of the leaving pattern are the gifts of psychic and subtle perception.

The inner critic is part of something larger that Freud called the “superego.” It develops in early childhood, roughly between two and five years of age. The superego’s job is to stop you from doing things that will get you in trouble with your parents and caretakers.

In a love relationship, it often makes them reluctant to surrender into loving deeply and unconditionally. They are unconsciously afraid that unrestrained love will once again cost them their autonomy and obligate them to do whatever the Beloved says.15

One of their first tasks is simply to learn to put their attention on and feel their raw body sensations.

“What pattern am I in right now? And how is this pattern coloring my view of what I’m reading?”

As Masters of Connection, they can feel that everything is connected to everything, so they understand that they are connected to all the rest of the Universe, and that everyone else is, too.

healthy. Blasting others is violent and abusive. A big part of the healing work for those who run this pattern is seeing the effect that their actions have on others, giving up their sense of entitlement, and taking responsibility for managing their own energy.

Withdrawal from others and from the body Two other psychological defenses often used by leaving-patterned people are withdrawal from others and withdrawal from the body into the mind.