Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself

We Feel We Can’t Tolerate the Discomfort of Setting Boundaries Setting limits is uncomfortable, and that discomfort is enough for most of us to shy away from setting them. So we stay silent. We can’t tolerate the discomfort of having what we assume will be difficult conversations

Avoiding a discussion of our expectations doesn’t prevent conflict. It prolongs the inevitable task of setting boundaries.

Avoidance wasn’t an effective strategy for me, and it isn’t for you either. In the gentlest way possible, say “No, thanks, that doesn’t work for me; I’m not interested.” Or, “No, you can’t borrow my car.” Don’t waste your time and anyone else’s time hoping they will figure it out.

Some ultimatums are harder, such as those that will lead you to terminate a relationship or cut someone off. Before cutting someone off, however, consider this: Have I set any boundaries? What are some possible ways that the other person might respond to my boundaries? Is the other person aware of my issues with them? Have I been harmed beyond repa

Boundaries are expectations and needs that help you feel safe and comfortable in your relationships.

Burnout is caused by Not knowing when to say no Not knowing how to say no Prioritizing others over yourself People-pleasing Superhero syndrome (“I can do it all”) Unrealistic expectations Not being appreciated for what you

You’re Anxious About Future Interactions After a Boundary Has Been Set The fear is, “Things will be awkward between us after this.” Well, declaring a fear makes it so. If you state that you’ll behave awkwardly during

Being honest and up front (from the beginning, if possible) about what you expect and what you can offer will save you and your partner lots of heartache and arguments.

“When you don’t respect my boundaries, I feel ____.” Then restate