Instead of focusing on rules, Taking Children Seriously focuses on fostering understanding. Parenting is the process of supporting a child until they understand the world well enough that they can support themselves. What is the best way to foster understanding? To provide freedom and security for a person’s creativity to discover how the world works. Rules limit freedom, and hence understanding, and therefore impair the parenting project.

Aaron Stupple • The Sovereign Child: How a Forgotten Philosophy Can Liberate Kids and Their Parents

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approval. You can raise children who feel both free and responsible, but in order to do this, you must first feel free and responsible yourself.

Rebecca Anne Bailey • Easy To Love, Difficult To Discipline: The 7 Basic Skills For Turning Conflict

Concretely speaking, instead of commanding from above that the child must study, one acts on him in such a way that he can gain the confidence to take care of his own studies and face his tasks on his own.

Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga • The Courage to Be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon That Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness

Teach children how to bootstrap their own program, so that they can be individually conscious. The tension that we have described between culture and consciousness has an analog during development. Trying to teach children precisely how to be adults, by inculcating them solely with the cultural rules that have come before, will fail. In a world of

Heather Heying • A Hunter-Gatherer's Guide to the 21st Century: Evolution and the Challenges of Modern Life

sometimes we are held back by our own insecurities. As parents, this is one of the most difficult obstacles to overcome, but we’re all capable of treating our children respectfully if we keep the basics in mind. Honor their wishes and interests, which may be different from our own. Challenge them to be their best at whatever activities they choose.

Esther Wojcicki • How to Raise Successful People

afraid to allow children to get much distance or experience much autonomy

Kent Hoffman • Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore