Clinical studies of such children reveal that a preponderance of them have parents who have related to them in either a helpless and fearful way or a hostile and self-referential one. The children of helpless and fearful parents, in particular, have a very difficult time later in life. Their parents tend to be sweet and fragile, not hostile or aggr

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Anxiety also transmits family sins. If a parent did not feel safe as a child and became distrusting of others, fearful of simple behaviors such as flying or driving, or unable to relax or sleep properly, her child is probably susceptible to this same anxiety. One woman, a highly successful screenwriter from Chicago, had so internalized her anxious

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To avoid the bad feelings, the child slowly learns to identify only with what he thinks of as “good” and to deny anything “bad” as part of who he is. He actually starts limiting his identity to only include what he has come to believe is “acceptable” in the eyes of his parents. Yet another child may despair altogether of getting any good strokes fr

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