Does Anyone Really Know You?
you never really know anyone
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George Orwell once said: The most terrible loneliness is not the kind that comes from being alone, but the kind that comes from being misunderstood; the loneliness of standing in a crowded room, surrounded by people who do not see you, who do not hear you, who do not know the true essence of who you are. And in that loneliness, you feel as though
... See moreThere’s a certain quiet violence in realizing you’ll never know most people deeply. You’ll never see the little rituals that hold them together. Never hear the thing they say out loud when they’re alone in the car. Never know how they feel about rain on Tuesdays, or whether they sleep with one leg out of the blanket, or who first taught them how to... See more
you never really know anyone
even in cases where we’re devoted to a person, and know a lot about them, it’s still possible to not see them. You can be loved by a person yet not be known by them.
David Brooks • How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
When, in adulthood, you get to know someone really well, you often develop a sense for how they were raised. You see in some people’s current insecurities how as children they must have been diminished and criticized. You see, in their terror over being abandoned, how they must have felt left behind when young. On the other hand, when you meet
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