When it’s safe, you can say anything.

When it’s unsafe, you start to go blind.

Break free of these Fool’s Choices by searching for the and.

Greta taught us that a small, mental intervention—the simple act of asking a potent question—can have a powerful effect on redirecting our hearts.

Skilled people Start with Heart. That is, they begin high-risk discussions with the right motives, and they stay focused no matter what happens.

DIALOGUE When it comes to risky, controversial, and emotional conversations, skilled people find a way to get all relevant information (from themselves and others) out into the open. That’s

To encourage the free flow of meaning and help others leave silence or violence behind, explore their Paths to Action. Start with an attitude of curiosity and patience. This helps restore safety. Then, use four powerful listening skills to retrace the other person’s Path to Action to its origins. • Ask. Start by simply expressing interest in the

When you have a tough message to share, or when you are so convinced of your own rightness that you may push too hard, remember to STATE your path: • Share your facts. Start with the least controversial, most persuasive elements from your Path to Action. • Tell your story. Explain what you’re beginning to conclude. • Ask for others’ paths.

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. —GEORGE BERNARD SHAW