Are we responsible for other people's emotions?

We usually think our suffering is caused by others — our parents, our partner, our enemies. But out of forgetfulness, anger, or jealousy, we say or do things that create suffering for ourselves and others.

If someone close to you is upset, you become upset too, and think that they might be distressed because of something that you did; therefore, it’s up to you to “fix” their negative state. If you are unable to, you take it hard, dragging yourself down further into blame and upset.

other people’s negative emotions are ultimately a problem that belongs to them. And you have to allow other people their problems.

How many people am I angry at? How many people do I harbor ungenerous feelings toward, simply because I am privy to their suffering and frightened by it, and so need to keep it at bay with anger and criticism?

Acknowledge intent while addressing impact. It is possible to be well-meaning and still cause harm. No matter our intention, we practice accountability when we are willing to acknowledge the impact of our words and actions on others. Likewise, people’s words and behaviors may have an impact on us, but they are rarely actually about us. The way we r