#198: Trying to see something

A struggle inward rather than upward or outward, a reorientation away from growth in an objective sense.

I’m working on becoming more aware, ultimately—just as good at noticing what’s always been here as what’s just arrived or hasn’t yet. No surprise I’m basically just describing mindfulness, one of the oldest human pursuits, increasingly urgent. So... See more

She quotes Viktor Shklovsky: “habitualization devours work, clothes, furniture, one's wife, and the fear of war... and art exists so that one may recover the sensation of life.” Then she goes on: “ the trick in writing/life... is to figure out how to import a chunk of the past into the present, so your present self can feel all the things you’ve fo... See more

I think of this like a personal Overton window (although I know the analogy doesn’t make perfect sense). A kind of private tunnel vision that rearranges our reality so that our highs and lows are defined by only the most immediate wins and losses, with everything else rendered irrelevant—the hard fought habits we’ve kept, the old lessons that stuck... See more

I think it’s interesting how this happens—the way the highest functioning aspects of our machinery, however miraculous or unique, disappear into the background of our perception. I thought of this in a more personal context the other day, when a friend was feeling depressed about a lack of momentum in her career. She was plagued by memories of how ... See more