18 Minutes

We’ll look at the four elements—your strengths, weaknesses, differences, and passions—that form the foundation of your success and happiness. It’s at the intersection of those four elements that your time will be best spent.

When an unsettling event occurs, pause before reacting. In that pause, ask yourself a single question: What is the outcome I want? Then, instead of reacting to the event, react to the outcome. In other words, stop reacting to the past and start reacting to the future. If someone yells at you, pause before yelling back. Then ask yourself what outcom

How did the day go? What success did I experience? What challenges did I endure? 2. What did I learn today? About myself? About others? What do I plan to do—differently or the same—tomorrow? 3. Whom did I interact with? Anyone I need to update? Thank? Ask a question of? Share feedback with?

It’s not enough to see yourself in a certain way; you need to act on it. Build it into your year. Your day. It won’t help if you identify as a father but rarely spend time with your children. Or if religion is a big part of your identity and yet you rarely engage in religious activities.

Trying to maintain a commitment to yourself or someone else? Identify the times when you are most at risk of violating that commitment. Then, whatever you do, don’t give up in the moments when you’re most vulnerable.

As long as you create the right environment—one in which you feel challenged, loved, and respected—then you’ll be motivated enough to keep moving in the right direction. Even without a plan. Even without a destination.

Your goal is to make it easier to do something you want done and harder not to.

But if you leverage your strengths, embrace your weaknesses, assert your

Maybe you need to take the car in for an oil change. Maybe you need to read all the reviews about the iPad (and then wait in line to buy one). Those are all fine uses of your 5 percent. But if it becomes 20 percent, it means you’re spending too much time on other people’s priorities, your frivolity, and life maintenance,

2. Start over. This is a mental game I learned from a friend who’s a successful investor. I was hesitant to sell an investment that was doing poorly. My friend asked me the following question: If I were starting from scratch at today’s price, would I purchase the investment? I sold it that day.