Sublime

Carl had grown up feeling that intimacy with a woman was difficult, if not dangerous, that women weren’t very genuine and comfortable with who they were. Given the interpersonal minefield that Carl associated with relationships with women, I surmised that sexual excitement would have a difficult time safely flourishing. It then seemed clearer how

Clinton’s treatment suggested a much larger cultural ill, one that had less to do with the specifics of her personality and more to do with the enduring structures of patriarchy—structures that had bearing on more than just the woman standing on the stage asking you to vote for her. It was one thing to dislike Clinton. It was quite another to

“What women want is everything,” she told me from her office at UCLA. “They want the guy who will be a good long-term partner in a relationship, someone kind, caring, a good provider. These are more feminine traits. But what women also want is a very sexy guy, very good-looking, tall, muscular—the bad boy traits. They don’t usually come in the same

So many of the fears about desire seem to be things we should have overcome years ago. We can say we want to fuck indiscriminately, but we cannot exactly say that we expect to be happy.

“Mommy porn is a crude label applied to erotica read by discerning, intelligent women who seek something more adventurous in their reading choices,” the Hare said. “What?” Alice said. “Perhaps you should Google the word metafiction,” the Hare suggested.

Les fantasmes pornographiques trouvent davantage d’affinité avec les mondes sexuels historiquement constitués comme déviants (la masturbation, la sexualité en groupe, la sexualité entre partenaires occasionnels) qu’avec les mondes sexuels historiquement constitués comme légitimes (le couple). Malgré la constitution d’un marché de la vidéo

Explicit sharing of expectations and needs can weed out harmful people and act as a beacon to healthy people.