Sublime

and

A toxically shamed person is divided within himself and must create a false-self cover-up to hide his sense of being flawed and defective. You cannot offer yourself to another person if you do not know who you really are.

And we believe that families are the primary places where children learn how to be adults.

loss of self-esteem Beverly

forensic investigator of small data, or emotional DNA—a hunter, almost, of desire—a

Azy Barak, Michael Fenichel, John Grohol, Robert Hsiung, Storm King, Gary Stofle, and Kimberly Young,

While the offender was being abused as a child, one of their protector parts became desperate to protect them and took on the rageful or sexually violent energy of their perpetrator and used that energy to protect themself from that abuser.