Sublime

Here is a brilliant discussion of the implications of the Fourth Turning with Grant @ttmygh Williams and Adam @menlobear Taggart. Grant: we had a great chat for two hrs on a Saturday night in '99. Due for another... https://t.co/6if5lIWGC0

Not only does the house that is missing the cornice look incomplete aesthetically, but it also has severe structural problems because of the lack of a cornice. There is clear spalling from water streaming down the face of the building. Staining shows it's long been a problem.

When a survivor returns to their perpetrator, they're looking for validation. The hope is that the person who hurt them, will take ownership so some of the pain will stop. The risk in this is giving power to someone who has already shown how they use it.

When a person starts healing after living in survival mode, they have a deep desire for honesty & authenticity. They’ve had to fight for their ability to think clearly & know who they are. It’s been quite costly. They’re not willing to engage with those who won’t respect that.

cPTSD isn’t from one traumatic moment that tipped a person over to an unhealthy place. It’s the lack of a foundation and resources that could sustain a person living with the constant unknowns of new trauma.

Kids who grow up in toxic homes often lack understanding that they’re allowed to take up space, & don’t have to give more than they have in order to be respected. It makes sense for these beliefs to carry into adulthood but it doesn’t make sense to still believe they’re true.

Have you ever tried to confront someone and every sentence you say they flip back on you or change the subject? They’re not going to hear you. They do that because your level of honesty threatens their control. Their focus is how to regain control, not to help you feel heard.