Matthew Thompson

I think “And what else?” is the best coaching question in the world. It does two things: It extends the period of curiosity, and it tames your advice monster.

The way I define coaching is behavioral. Can you stay curious a little bit longer? Can you rush to action and advice-giving a little bit more slowly?

I had to bet on myself being different. Everybody showed up in blue suits and white shirts and red ties, business dress of the early 1990s. I was wearing a tie-dyed, pink tie, I had long blonde hair and earrings in. I thought I’m either going to come in a distant last or I’m going to come in first. That’s it. I don’t want to come in the middle.

You have to bet on yourself and how you're different to make it work," he said.

The reason Riley has his incredible resume is that he understands leaders don’t need a resume or banners. They need: 1. Honesty without fear of confrontation. 2. Be direct, don’t pull punches, but don’t act in anger. 3. Set the standard, become the standard. 4. Don’t play favorites. 5. Remain confident with a sense of humility. 6. Blame no one. 7.

One of the most intelligent case studies in design is the Chinese tea cup. They’re made without handles simply because if it’s too hot to touch, it’s too hot to drink.

Humans naturally want to add more. Add a cardboard sleeve, add a warning on the outside of the cup, add a handle. The result of all these things never cools down the actual contents.

I sign off my emails now with, “You’re awesome, and you’re doing great.” I think that’s a mantra for my life, which is having a good sense of self-belief, and even when things are going badly, I’m probably doing the best I can. You can’t always control the circumstances or how things play out. You can only commit to the process.

Curiosity unlocks insight about the situation and yourself. Curiosity helps people feel seen, understood and encouraged. If you lead with curiosity, it’s a more powerful place to lead from most of the time.

(The first) question is “What’s your mind?” The last question is “What was most useful and most valuable?” The other one is “What’s the real challenge here for you?” It’s almost an identity element. It helps people figure out the real challenge rather than be the person who has the ideas. That’s actually a much rarer, more useful skill in most