"If I wouldn’t want to do this for them, it’s not fair to ask for it myself," they think. But relationships aren’t about mirroring each other's exact wants — they’re about generosity, difference, and negotiating real needs.
the internet convinced me that consistency was more important than authenticity. but authenticity includes seasons of withdrawal, reflection, and silence. forcing yourself to produce when your soul is asking for rest is violence, not dedication.
Plato saw love as a ladder toward the divine, a disruption meant to elevate. Commitment, meanwhile, was social glue: a civic duty, a property contract, a family alliance.
Love can be delusional. It can be a trauma bond. It can be a performance of your own ideal self. Commitment, conversely, must stop being seen as the death of romance. Done well, it’s the scaffold love climbs. It’s the difference between a spark and a fire that keeps you warm. But this requires work – on ourselves, first. Not just learning how to... See more
In this way, commitment becomes the deepest manifestation of freedom, not its enemy. To stay, not because you must, not because you fear the alternative, but because you want to, is an act of liberation. It is not submission; it is autonomy in duet.